NO T.P.? HELP! (is on the way)

I’m not quite sure why, but for some reason COVID-19 seems to have wiped out (pun intended) all of the world’s toilet paper supplies.


But wait — did you know there ARE alternatives? And I don’t mean going out to gather leaves!

Many years ago, I knew a lady who went camping in a primitive area (no water, no toilets) and forgot to take some TP out into the bushes with her. She looked around and decided that the leaves and vine growing up a nearby tree would make at least a semi-acceptable substitute. I definitely do NOT recommend this – especially if you can’t identify poisonous plants in your area. In this case, she had chosen to use poison ivy, Rhus toxicodendron. Our camping trip came to an ABRUPT end!

So, what other alternatives are there, you ask?

Two, that I’m aware of.

One that I recommend.

My first choice, and the one I personally use, is a simple squirt bottle and a washcloth.

Peri bottle

Back in “the olden days” when I was having my babies, the hospitals gave one of those things on the right to every new mother. (Maybe they still do. I don’t know. Too long since I’ve had a baby.)

It’s called a peri bottle.

It’s given to women who have just given birth because is does it better job of cleaning with less risk of infection than using toilet paper. You simply fill it with warm water, grab a washcloth, do your business, squirt off, and dry. Put an empty container next to the toilet for the used washcloths. If you’ve done a good job with the water, one washcloth per person should last for about a week between washings.

Very simple.

Very effective.

Saves trees, so it must be “green” (has someone told AOC about these? They should be part of her “Green New Deal”)

Some people pay good money to have something like this installed in the toilets in their homes, and they are widely used in Europe – from what I hear.

The installed version is called a bidet. Bidets are also available as a travel size personal bidet, for quite a bit more money than the bottle type I use.

In a pinch, an empty ketchup or mayonnaise bottle will work. Just test it over the sink first to make sure the top doesn’t come off when you squirt that warm water. No sense going “fishing” in the toilet – especially after you’ve just used it. ewwwwww

Moving right along…

The second method is to use large pieces of cloth to wipe. These can be anything from a washcloth to a 12×12 square of flannel.

I’ve heard it said that this method is what the pioneer women used as they came across the plains in America. It was called the 3-bag system, or something like that.

If you do this, you’ll need something like a diaper soak pail next to the toilet, and you’ll probably want to do laundry daily.

And now for the really good news…

There’s no toilet paper shortage at my house!

We’ve got bidets. 😀

Hope you have a wonderful day!



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